Sound Money

2025 was marked by our decision to move from Los Angeles to Cape Town, and everything that was required to make that decision a reality.

Big decisions like this always involve dozens of variables. Career considerations. Family considerations. Financial considerations. Cultural considerations. Practical considerations. But in my experience, the very big decisions often end up being boiled down to something simpler. They come down to what you feel like you need to do.

In 2019, when Zakeeya and I moved to America, it was something we needed to do. We needed to explore. We needed to adventure. We needed to pursue a lifelong dream.

The decision to move to Cape Town was more complicated in many respects. We had been thinking about it for a while. We weighed up numerous pros and cons. And then, one weekend, it became something we needed to do. My parents have some health issues, and there is only so much you can cover over the phone. We have a young family, and we appreciate all the support we can get. We needed to be closer to family for this next chapter of our lives, and their lives.

The move was the greatest challenge of the year, but also the most beautiful part of it.

Loving Local – Santa Monica

It’s funny. Moving to the other side of the world is such an expansive decision. And we certainly explored. We traveled around America. We went to Mexico. We saw different states and landscapes and cultures. It was an amazing adventure.

But the longer we lived in Los Angeles, the more local our life became. We would spend weeks on end in Santa Monica, the suburb where we lived. I avoided driving at all costs. I got around on my bicycle. Dropping Rumi at school. Going to the library. The park. The pool. Cycling down to the beach for a swim. I loved that rhythm. It was probably my greatest joy of living in LA. That feeling that everything I needed was within a few minutes’ ride.

The epitome of that local-theme was our relationship with our neighbours.

Neighbours – Unique Friendships

We shared a wall with our great friends, the Kracke family, and our friend Charles also lived next door. These friendships are some of the most surprising and joyful relationships.

It’s a slow burn with neighbors. You don’t want to overstep too soon. You’re careful. You don’t ask for too much too quickly. But over the years, slowly and steadily, the walls come down. We started asking for favours. We started sharing meals. We started helping with each other’s kids. We started popping in and out of each other’s homes without ceremony. And before you know it, they were family.

One of the most beautiful experiences was having three children between the ages of 3 and 10 bound into our apartment, unannounced, off their own accord. Each time they visited I would say, “you are always welcome here!” I think they knew that. Our son certainly felt at home in their house – that is an inexplicable gift for a parent to know.

While Rumi was learning to talk he would walk on to our balcony and call for our neighbour, “Charles!”. Ever patient, Charles would chat to Rumi for ages, trying to decipher what this toddler was saying. Hearing the sound of Charles tap turn on to water his garden, and Rumi and him nattering at each other for ages over the fence are some of the most special sounds. I think of Charles often when I am in garden and recognise the familiarity in plant species between his garden and my mom’s.

When we decided to leave Los Angeles, we had a good few months to wind things down. I am really grateful for that time – It gave us an opportunity to say goodbye properly. To revisit places. To spend time with the people that mattered. To feel the weight of what we were leaving. Realizations of how much this place and these people meant to us.

We were loved and supported more and more the longer we were in LA, right up until the very last moment. I’ll never forget the last night we spent in our apartment in Santa Monica. Zakeeya and I were furiously cleaning so we could get out that evening. Things were getting tight. It was a challenge to manage the kids while cleaning out the last remnants of our physical existence in LA. Ben received Rumi & Frida with open arms. No hesitation.

I cannot tell you how much I love these people! It beings tears to my eyes often when I think of them. Experiencing such love in this way makes me want to try and be the best neighbour possible to any future neighbours. I know you can never recreate the past, but there is no harm in putting out those intentions and seeing where they go. Suburban South African life can make that a little trickier with our high walls and back gardens (which Rumi loves playing in!). But I am trying my best to go out for walks and speak to all the random people on the street. One day we might be friends.

Many tears were shed in those last few weeks. Mostly from me… But the Kracke kids were so sad to say goodbye to us too. I am glad it wasn’t just emotional me. They regard us as family too. I look forward to the day we are reunited on a camping trip again.

One of the goals heading into the new year is to maintain those connections. It’s not easy with the time difference. But we’ll do our best. This is part of the motivation for finally putting these thoughts onto paper.

Of course, the emotional roller coaster of leaving LA was only one half of the story. Big emotional decisions come with practical consequences. The second half of the year was dominated by logistics.

Logistical Burn

Thankfully Zakeeya is a machine planner and organiser. She packed up our life and organized the container. Every last meticulous detail, including what we would be able to take on the plane with us. Our move across the world was pretty seamless thanks to her. Just one of a multitude of reasons to be thankful for her.

I was more focused on restructuring the business, closing down accounts and managing our eventual arrival in Cape Town. It was a lot.

Thankfully, we had enormous support. Zak’s parents were with us for two months when Frida was born. That was a massive help. It allowed us to enjoy those early months of her life without being completely overwhelmed. It was another reminder of how supported we are.

But even with that support, the mental load was high. It would be easy to gloss over that and say it was just “part of the move,” which is true. But on reflection it absorbed capacity. It reduced creative bandwidth. It shifted the tone of the year.

In many ways, I felt myself becoming less creative, less philosophical, less analytical, and more practical. More focused on structure, on making sure everything was properly set up for the long term and, in the short-term, just keeping our heads above water. That required a different skill set, a different mindset, a more sober tone and it does not always feel great. Perhaps that is a season or perhaps it is also a common trend with the responsibilities of adulthood. Both are probably true…

Children: A Gift from the Universe

What a miracle to have another bundle of life explode into our lives with Frida Katija’s arrival in September. I try hard not to compare the experience of each child, but it has certainly been different to the first time. Zakeeya and I spent so much time alone with Rumi in LA. Frida gets a lot more love from her grandparents, because they’re in the house with us. With two kids, the juggle is real, and alone time is rare. Nevertheless, the experience is wondrous and I am trying to soak up each moment. She’s 5 months old now, smiling and laughing. Just a bundle of squishy human. I feel myself falling deeper in love with her each passing day.

It is funny how inconceivable the whole notion of children is. When Zakeeya was pregnant with Frida, I could not compute that a second child was on the way and now I cannot compute that she will grow into a toddler like Rumi – a complete force of nature. Life is a wild roller coaster. We truly have so little control. I am just trying to do my best each day and enjoy the ride.

Highlights: Work, Motherhood, Visitors

There were numerous professional positives in the year. My trading improved. I made some strong calls during the year. My options trading became more sophisticated. I handled administrative responsibilities at a higher level than I have in the past. I hosted and spoke on a panel at CFA LA, which I’m proud of – it was a great finale after all the years networking in the LA finance industry.

On the personal front, I am proud of pulling together Zakeeya’s motherhood ceremony in LA. It was not technically difficult, but it required me to really listen to what she needed, channel those intentions and lean on her friends. She has great friends and they came to the party. It was deeply meaningful for her, and I was glad to have played my part. Opening to my wife and her experience of life is something I eternally need to do more of.

Having my childhood friend, Chris, visit LA from Singapore was also a year highlight. When you live away from home it is particularly special to show your new home to family and friends. It allows you an opportunity to celebrate the place you’ve come to know, to appreciate all that it has to offer. It makes the experience of living there more real. It connects your old life to your new. As soon as Chris heard that we were leaving, he mobilised and came to visit. It meant a lot to me.

There were also things that didn’t happen. The book remains unwritten. Life’s greatest challenge is to prioritise, and then focus on what’s important. It nags at me that I’ve put the book off but once the decision to move was made, it felt like there simply wasn’t capacity for the book.

Building Routine. Following Seasonal Rhythm

Throughout it all, I continued to swim most weeks and I have kept that rhythm on arrival in Cape Town. Swimming in the sea was one of my favourite parts of LA. Cycling down through the hustle and bustle of Santa Monica every Saturday and meeting up with the same group for 5 years. Slowly but surely I became very close to those people and I miss them. The sea in Cape Town is different. It is wonderful in its own right. I love this exploration of a city I have known for so many years, but in ways that I am unfamiliar with. There are always new things to see if you look closely.

Settling back into Cape Town life has been easy in some respects and strange in others. We are living under one roof with my parents and more people always imply more personalities so a major focus at the start of the new year is to find a new sustainable rhythm, individually and collectively. We will also need to make structural changes to the living arrangement at some point, so there are many more practical questions related to this move that require our focus. But it is beautiful to have my parents spend so much time with our kids and we are grateful for all their support. One of the greatest gifts of life, particularly with kids, is to notice the smaller priceless moments. There are many of these moments packed into each day and I eternally grateful for this.

Looking back, if there is one theme that stands out, it is that life is fuller now. Busier. Heavier in some respects. There is less capacity than there once was. That’s not a complaint. It’s just a reality. The challenge going forward is to simplify. To delegate where possible. To protect time for the things that matter. To stay connected to the people who matter. To be intentional with our time. And to accept that every season requires a different version of you.

I send all my love to my friends and family, wherever you may find yourself – physically or mentally. I hope you can smile to yourself through all the little moments, forgive yourself for your mistakes and ‘begin again’, embracing what tomorrow has to offer.